15 Ways to Celebrate Michelle Obama’s 50th Birthday

The liberal media empire has gone even softer with the Obamas hoping to divert attention from the failed policies of this administration by gushing wildly over Michelle’s 50th birthday. ABC News published an article “50 Ways to Celebrate Michelle Obama’s Birthday.”

Here are the first five:

1. Dance to Beyonce

2. Eat your vegetables

3. Move into a massive new house with your family and invite your mother to move in too [at the taxpayers’ expense]

4. Work out yours arms

5. Make the cover of Vogue

I’ve come up with 15 things that we can do to celebrate Michelle Obama’s 50th birthday:

1. Vote for Tea Party Candidates in 2014 and 2016.

2. If you’re unemployed, find any job you can even if it means working a minimum wage job.

3. Do not sign up for ObamaCare

4. Remove your children from your local government (public) school.

5. Buy a gun and extra ammunition even if you never use them. It’s the principle.

6. Have another baby to outbreed the Democrats.

7. Dance to Tim Hawkins’ “The Government Can” instead of Beyonce.

8. Eat a loaded slice of pizza.

9. Hang out with Ted Cruz and other conservatives at CPAC.

10. Challenge Michelle Obama to a push-up contest. Anybody can beat Bishop Desmond Tutu.

11. Don’t go to Princeton or Harvard. Save your money and start a business.

12. Smoke a cigar.

13. Pay for your own vacations.

14. Give a speech at the Democrat National Convention on why the Progressive Moment is a form of slavery.

15. Buy a calendar marked when we’ll no longer have to hear about Michelle Obama and her birthday.