DHS Orders Lots Of Ammo And…Bagpipes?

DHS Secretary Napolitano claimed that there was nothing to be alarmed about when it became known that DHS as well as many other federal agencies were buying up all kinds of ammo. They were just taking advantage of the bulk discount. They were trying to save money and be “fiscally conservative.” Besides, it wasn’t like they were buying any more ammo than they had in the past. So stop being so paranoid of your government. Remember, we’re America. We’re the exception to history. Nothing bad could ever happen here.

And their purchases were purely for training purposes. Even their purchases of hollow-point ammo, which is about twice as expensive as regular ammo and probably twice as deadly.

The bigger question for a lot of conservatives wasn’t so much about what these federal agencies were planning to do with all their ammo hoards. It was more about why they were focusing on buying so much ammo (especially expensive hollow-point ammo) when the Obama administration had just been clamoring about how the world was going to end with sequestration.

Police officers, firefighters, schoolteachers, food and drug inspectors, Border Patrol, air traffic control towers, DOD employees, etc.; they were all going to either lose their jobs, face furloughs or be shut down because of budget cuts. And bless her heart, Napolitano had to let thousands of illegal immigrants (is that offensive) go free, because they just can’t afford to house them any longer with all these budget cuts.

But they’ll waste money on all sorts of projects like there’s no tomorrow. Napolitano even wanted to invest in some bagpipes, along with bagpipe and snare drum accessories. Here are just a few of what she was looking for:

PiobMaster 2.3 CD ROM-Bagpipe music writing software, 1, EA;

  • Carbon Bagpipe Drone Reed Set, 5, EA;
  • Bagpipe Chanter Reeds-Easy, 12, EA;
  • Bagpipe Chanter Reeds-Medium, 12, EA;
  • Deluxe Bagpipe Bag Covers w/ Non-slip Grap Patch and Zipper, 5, EA;
  • Bagpipe Tutor Book – VOL 1 C.O.P., 10, EA;
  • Practice Chanter Reed, 10, EA;
  • PiobMaster 2.3 CD ROM-Bagpipe music writing software, 1, EA;

What do these have to do with national security or protecting the homeland?

Well, bagpipes are probably the only instrument to have been considered an “instrument of war.” In the aftermath of the Battle of Culloden in 1746, where Charles Edward Stuart led the Jacobites in attempting (and failing) to regain control of the Scottish throne and re-establish an absolute monarchy over Great Britain, Jacobite POWs were hanged for treason. Even James Reid, a bagpipe player:

“At his trial, it was alleged in his defense that he had not carried arms. The Court, however, observed that a Highland regiment never marched without a piper, and therefore, that in the eye of the law, Reid’s bagpipes were an instrument of war.”

So, maybe Big Sis is on to something here. Maybe the bagpipe orders were for national security purposes since they’re instruments of war. I can imagine how border patrol bagpipers might quell the influx of Mexicans illegally crossing the border. Just the sound of a bagpipe warming up is enough for me to plug my ears and run. Come to think of it, why is it that bagpipers always walk while they play their instrument? Maybe they’re trying to get away from the noise.

Update:  It looks like DHS cancelled the order after all.