New Study Suggests You Might Have Low IQ if You are Conservative

There’s an article going around that suggests that liberals have greater brain power than conservatives. These types of studies have been published for quite some time. The latest study suggests that conservative opinions are the result of less brain power, less thinking about a subject. Here’s one of the conclusions that’s come out from the study.

“The bad news for liberals is we’re saying that conservatism has a certain psychological advantage,” University of Arkansas psychologist Scott Eidelman said. “The bad news for conservatives is that someone who has a knee-jerk conservative reaction may change their mind about an issue after giving it more thought.”

Maybe it is true. Let’s put the hypothesis to the test.

If you spend more money than you earn, you will be in debt. That didn’t take much brain power, therefore, I must be a conservative. Liberals will use a lot of brain power to argue that deficits don’t matter, and all you have to do to get more money to take care of a deficit is to print more pieces of paper or enter a few more zeros into a computer. As a conservative, I wish I had thought of that.

Since I’m obviously less intelligent than a free-spending, counterfeiting liberal, please explain to me why the fiscal mess our nation and the rest of the world is in is a good thing? Why are the people in Greece rioting? I guess it takes being a liberal to know.

A conservative doesn’t have to use much brain power to conclude that if you pay people to do something, they’ll do more of that thing to get more money. It works on monkeys, don’t you know.

This means that if you pay people not to work or you pay women who have babies out of wedlock with no prospect of gainful employment, you are going to get more people who don’t work and more women who have babies. So if you want to get people to look for jobs and women not to have babies outside of marriage, you stop paying them for these counterproductive behaviors. That’s how a simplistic, low-IQ conservative thinks.

Contrary to all the bad effects of people not working and women having babies so they can get paid more money, liberals continue to support paying people not to work and women to keep having babies. Genius!

Low intellect conservatives believe that the best way to grow an economy is to remove as many obstacles so that people will have incentives to work in order to make a profit. The more incentives a person has, the more productive he or she will be. The productivity of a company that makes profits goes up and with it employment and more prosperity. Over time, prices of once expensive products come down so more people can afford them. I know, I know, that’s the low-IQ way at looking at economics.

High-IQ liberals believe, contrary to all evidence, that the best way to grow the economy is to tax the most productive members of a society and give the money taken from these people and distribute it to people who are less productive.

Now since this methodology has never worked in any country in which it has been tried (e.g., the former Soviet Union, North Korea, Cuba), continuing to do something that does not work is in most people’s world the work of someone with a low IQ. Einstein called it insanity. But because people with high IQs propose such nonsense, it must be the smart thing to do.