White House Sleight of Hand: These Scandals Don’t Exist

I thought only Jedi and wizards had these kinds of powers, but apparently the scandal-wracked White House is desperate enough to resort to mind tricks to make its troubles vanish.

The word has apparently gone forth to all the liberal corners of the land that those scandals you’ve been hearing about — Benghazi, IRS and AP phone records — don’t exist.

Really, after all the sound and fury, especially from a grumpy mainstream press that in this past week has woken from its slumber for the first time in years, this is the best defense the Obama Administration can come up with?

Just like the Force, Administration talking points can have a powerful effect on the weak-minded, and some stories about the “nothing-to-see-here” defense have already made it into print. The Atlantic Wire, for example, ran an entire article trying to reduce the Benghazi scandal to a kerfuffle over copy editing of internal memoranda.

The trolls have been hitting the Internet’s political boards, as well, pushing the notion that a) the Benghazi emails just show some people collaborating normally over what to say on Sunday talk shows; b) the IRS harassment of conservative organizations was just an effort to stop abuse and not a violation of the Hatch Act and other laws against campaign activities by federal employees; c) the seizing of Associated Press phone records was just part of a legal investigation to keep us all safe.

The White House has been rallying its press troops, as well. Barely a day after Chris Matthews criticized President Obama’s lack of interest in governing his own Administration, he was back to attacking critics of Obama for being racists — a charge which now includes him, apparently.

The best performance, however, has to be by presidential spokesman Jay Carney, who went on Piers Morgan’s usually friendly stage and found himself being questioned about how the Administration could restore Americans’ “faith” in the president.

“You’re concocting scandals that don’t exist,” Carney said, waving his hand. Well, not really, but you could easily imagine a scene out of “Star Wars” while listening to Carney warp and re-weave the fabric of reality.

“These aren’t the droids you’re looking for ….”

Carney continued, “Especially with regard to the Benghazi affair that was contrived by Republicans and, I think, has fallen apart largely this week,” Carney said. “The fact of the matter is that this administration has a record on transparency that outdoes any previous administrations.”

I have to agree, this Administration’s lies are very transparent.

You almost expect to see Morgan toddling off to the Mos Eisley cantina, secure in the knowledge that no droids have gotten past his keen eye.

Carney’s performance was reminiscent of Baghdad Bob, the Iraqi presidential spokesman who, in the early days of the Iraq War became famous for saying there were no Allied tanks in Iraq, while the television cameras clearly showed U.S. troops rolling through the outskirts of Baghdad.

The Administration is counting on its media allies to make its pain go away. With any luck, key Administration figures will remain in denial about the current scandals all the way out of office.