Yes, Jonny, There Is a War on Christmas

‘Tis the season when Fox News is the only mainstream media outlet to report, much less notice, the annual sharpening of knives by atheists out to destroy any public semblance of Christmas celebration.

And it wouldn’t be the holiday season without liberals like comedian Jon Stewart weighing in to deny that there is any war on Christmas.

To be sure, the atheists go after Hanukkah as well, but as the celebration of the miracle in the temple hasn’t enjoyed nearly the commercial success of Christmas, Jews don’t have as large a bull’s eye on their backs at this time of year as Christians have.

Stewart’s response to Fox covering the annual story of the atheists’ March of the Grinches was classic liberal: “You’re f***ing nuts!”

While Christians in Santa Monica, California, have had to fight the courts and the city to keep a 60-year community tradition of Nativity scenes alive, and seniors living at The Willows in Newhall, California, are fighting a management dictate banning menorahs and Christmas trees, according to liberals like Stewart, there is no war on Christmas.

“For whatever annoying local ticky-tack Christmas abolishing story you and your merry band of persecution-seeking researchers can scour the wires to turn up, the rest of us can’t swing a dead elf without knocking over an inflatable snowman or a giant blinking candy cane,” Stewart said.

I understand his point, and I realize it’s difficult for some liberals to wrap their heads around, but elves, Santa Claus, flashing candy canes, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and Frosty the Snowman aren’t the real Christmas, at least not the one Christians are worried about.

(Christmas trees were apparently co-opted by German Christians in the 16th century from pagan traditions. According to legend, it was none other than Martin Luther himself who first put lights in a tree for the holiday, so while not biblical, the Christmas tree at least has something of a historical pedigree.)

No, the war on Christmas is actually the seasonal version of the war on Christ, which is year-round as atheists try to establish their beliefs as the only acceptable public religion.

Of course, guys like Stewart would never acknowledge that Christianity is being purposely forced out of public view, because then the liberal sheeple might become alarmed.

“As a general rule if you’re trying to tell whether you and one other person are nuts, ask a third person. Preferably someone outside the asylum,” said Arkham’s chief inmate to his audience.