Theater of the Absurd: The New Watergate and That Big Tobacco Check

There’s nothing like a good chuckle when you’re recovering from the flu to make you feel better, and count on the country’s Left to deliver.

First, there was President Obama’s State of the Union address, which itself contained several knee slappers, though some of them were admittedly funnier if you have a touch of masochism in your personality.

But for pure comedy, you had to watch the response to the response to the State of the Union. Not Marco Rubio’s speech, which was cogent if a bit excitably delivered.

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The real laughs were provided by the Left’s reaction to Rubio’s water break. Part way through his speech, the parched senator ducked out of sight for a moment to grab a sip from a strategically placed water bottle.

The Twits of social media immediately erupted in cackling glee, twitting, twooting and twut-twutting about the horrendous “gaffe.”

Really? After sitting through the cascade of lies, misrepresentations and misdirections that was the State of the Union, the thing that gets the Left riled is a sip of water from a plastic bottle?

The water break got its own segment on CBS and other networks. CNN’s Wolf Blitzer, or rather the prematurely octogenarian extraterrestrial wag that has taken over the former body of “Scud Stud” journalist Wolf Blitzer, actually wondered on camera whether Rubio’s sippo del agua was a “career ender.”

For some reason, the water scenario makes me think of Patrick Stewart, the actor who played the great Capt. Jean-Luc Picard. I recall several years ago when Stewart confided that when he performs, he likes to hide orange slices around the stage so that when his throat gets dry he can take a quick juice break.

It doesn’t seem to have done his career any harm. Perhaps the Left would be more forgiving if Rubio dressed like a Starfleet officer.

Another day brightener came from George Washington University Law professor John Banzhaf, who seriously suggested that the Tea Party is a front for Big Tobacco.

First off, I’m not sure how “big” Big Tobacco is these days, with all the taxes, restrictions and so on placed on smokers and tobacco products. But more to the point, if the Tea Party’s a front for tobacco companies, why are the meetings held at Coco’s instead of Flavor Country, why don’t Teapots look cooler than we are, and why hasn’t the Marlboro Man cut me a check yet?

It puts me in mind of another Patrick Stewart reminiscence. There was a scene where the shuttle bay of the Starship Enterprise was filled with cows, pigs, chickens and barefoot country types the crew had rescued from some doomed planet.

Faced with a high-tech ship full of lowing cattle and chicken feathers, the normally stoic Capt. Picard simply broke into hysterical laughter, commenting that “sometimes, Number One, you just have to… bow to the absurd.”

And that’s good advice, especially when liberals rule the news media.

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